Frodi and the Pigeon

“What’s that you’ve got now Froodle?” I asked stepping over him to get to the sink

“I think it’s a drone” he said then sneezed as he had a feather on his nose

“Probably delivering something obscure to the Amish hipsters next door” I said, followed by “OMG, OMFG, WTF, FFS, GTFO, SMH, FOAD, FFFCF”

“You made that last one up” said Kato

“You can probably work it out” I snapped “But before you do that, can someone explain why we’ve got a dead pigeon in the kitchen”

“Half a dead pigeon” burped Frodi then sneezed again, one of those sneezes that elevates the dog completely off the ground while they shake and splutter.

“FFFCF” said Kato “F for Frodi, C for cat?”

I opened the undersink cupboard to get the dead avian removal equipment.

“Where’s it gone?” I glared at Frodi “I am so cross, spitting feathers here!”

“Wez whad goon?” he said in a strange accent as he was literally spitting feathers and looked like he had just lost a pillow fight “Hic”

Frodi’s tummy made a glooping, gurgling sound

“Feel a tad queasy” he said

Kato snickered.

“Right” I announced “Get out. Go eat grass. Be sick. And do not come back until every trace including AUDIO has gone!”

“Those claws are going to smart whichever way they reappear” smirked Kato “Was it F for feline?”